Week one

What I discovered on my first week off:

The first day was a bit depressing, it was a cloudy damp day. The kids were not home some I had a lot of alone time to process and grieve if you will, the loss of my job. For 24 years I had a place to go, a purpose, a goal. This was gone, it is now a part of my past. I know I'll move on however I also know that I needed to go through this process to move forward.

Traffic and construction. I can not figure out while so many are on the road and why construction is everywhere. During the week I ran a few errands what I estimated to take me a 10 minute drive was a half an hour with detours to boot.

Everyone is adapting. While I am thinking about myself and what I now want and need, I see that I am not alone. My husband is now curious as to how I'm spending my time, I think he envisions me on the computer doing nothing all day. The kids have lost track as to what day it is, being off of school and me home now.

How does it feel? This is the question everyone is asking. I am elated and thrilled that our income is now cut in half, NO. Is it worth not having the constant feeling of stress and anxiety? YES! I can breath, and that feels great.

Structure. I am discovering I do need some sense of structure, a plan for the day if you will. The few days I "took it easy" were non productive and made me feel lazy. The days I had a little to do list, I felt better.

Now what? I sit here trying to figure out week two.

Unemployed for the first time

I am 46 years old and have been someones employee for 24 years. Now don't get me wrong I am also a mother, wife, daughter and sister. That is how I see myself, unfortunately as you can see work came first.
That is until Monday ( June 29th, 2015).
I joke that I did not choose my midlife crisis, rather is found me. The company I have been with for half my life is going through major changers and stress. With impending possibilities of the company closing it was time to reevaluate my life and priorities.
I did a lot of sole searching over the course of a year. Was I up to the challenges of starting anew with the company? How will this effect my family? My stress? My anxiety? After a lot of sole searching and planning and evaluating I knew I needed to give notice. I planned and saved to allow myself a few weeks to spend the summer with my children and figure out - now what?